What does life mean to you?
This was my message, painted on a school wall while sitting under a tree, licking my wounds. My first thought was love, and then I though some more and all I could think of was freedom. Without freedom we do not have love.
What are we fighting for now? This prison planet or what do we have to fight for in order to free ourselves. This date last year I was fighting to free myself from the tyranny of so many things:
My freedom from the mental institution
The freedom to use my voice
I am still working on freeing myself.
It has been a year of learning more and more about how I am imprisoned in this world.
It has been a hell of a week. Trying to free ourselves from financial ruin every step of the way. One bomb after the other. Each one leading me to something I have been told not to fear.
And that is fear itself. And in my mind I tell myself I know there is nothing to fear but my heart is beating faster and faster. My blood pressure rising. It is fight now or flight. I am running on adrenaline now or I will fall. I am trying so hard to fly.
Free as a bird. But everywhere I turn I find out I am confined.
I am caged like a canary in a coal mine.
Dominic dropped by two days ago. He got a call from our bank manager who was very concerned. Guess she thought we had flown the coup, literally and we’re walking from our home because our mortgage payment was a couple of weeks late that month.
My God, imagine this was so detrimental to the bank. Oh, what I have learnt about banks, and all their bush shit. I understand their logic; but the logic of people who work for these institutions absolutely confounds me.
I am trying very, very hard not to just give up. It is ludicrous. How many people are so complicit in enslaving themselves and everyone around them. The people in power don’t have to lift a finger. They will get their slaves to do it. And what is so confounding to me is how gullible people are and actually think they are doing a good job.
Good job? Sending a threatening letter from the LAW threatening to start LEGAL proceedings unless the BANK receives every single penny they have stolen from me, plus let’s not forget the taxes. This is a sin and make sure you have insurance to boot, in case some accident happens, and they will suffer some loss, because you see, they own you and everything you thought you owned. Look it up. Look at the law. And to add a cherry on top of the cake they are charging me a $40o legal bill to send this letter.
So I say to myself. Where is this evil coming from and the only answer I have, and the truth, the absolute horrible truth is that it comes from people like you and me who think we are doing a good job because our bosses, who we are not allowed to question, will be happy.
Ironically I read in the newspaper BMO is starting lay offs. 150 employees or should I say human resources. These corporations whose employees fuck their fellow man, in order to be a good employee.
Don’t even get me started on comprehending how some ever so diligent employee decided to have me investigated for fraud. Because I assume, who knows the intelligence on this one, that for some reason I am 2 weeks behind in my payment, on a property that is very desirable (houses in our area are selling like hotcakes, and have gone up at least 10% since I purchased it) and I am skipping town. Guess I am just going to leave this income investment for the bank. Very intelligent of me.
And this shows how duped some eager beaver employee is thinking. This is what we do to each other.
How in the world can we win over this new world order if this is how we are treating each other?
And this cause me
We have nothing to fear but ourselves.
And now I am licking my wounds because there has been a lot of fighting going on in my own home. Stress, I assume is the culprit. But once again I find we are fighting each other.
Dave Icke, coincidentally just said love is the greatest emotion, violence is the least. And there has been fighting going on here. And I am licking my wounds and trying to understand why we enslave ourselves and use violence against each other.
Mainly because when we express ourselves it is so very hard for some one to take.
So I will leave this journal entry, with a saying that has stuck in my head for years. I don’t know why? But it is important for me to say.
If you love someone
Set them free
If they don’t come back to you
There were never yours
And it is about
Even if you don’t love me anymore.