Friday, January 14, 2011


August 27, 2007
We must never forget yesterday
Cause that’s the day
TeePoo came to stay

Well I feel like I have finally arrived… back home… now we are the three amigos.  My dear Al, and our new addition to the family.


Who has just has so much personality.  We call him T for short.  But it won’t take long, I am certain till he will write the wrongs.  This is what Al and I both need, someone else to shower our love on.  Always good to have a buffer I have noticed a lot in these last few days.

Once again, where to start?  Nothing absolutely nothing, went according to plan.  I am getting very used to this and realize even more how it’s so important to roll with the punches.  Sometimes expectations can really get in the way.  So from now on I will save them for another day.

Both Nancy and Denis have been staying with us since I last wrote.  Both escaping situations that needed changing.  I think Nancy just needs to put her foot down with Barry.  Relationships take work.  Lots of work and I think in this crazy world sometimes we throw away the baby with the bath water.  Or in this case Barry.

Especially when it comes to affairs of the heart, trouble with a capital T love causes you and me.  We should all be required to get therapy when it comes to affairs of the heart because hearts are so easily broken.

When we are young and strong, like Denis, it is easier to carry on.  But I know if I broke Al’s heart or he broke mine we would be shattered.  So I promised Al’s parents I will take care of Al like Al takes care of me.  I told his dad that this is what I love to do anyway.

But now I will have to fight for his attention with TeePoo.  This actually is a little good for me.  Wasn’t use to all this attention.  We now have someone who needs our attention.  So we think having Mr. T will bring us some normality.  Routine we have been lacking greatly and what is home is safe and comfortable and in this crazy fucked up world we need all the comforts we can get.

Like spaghetti, oh I smell it now.  Can you believe the 1st time I met Al’s Mummy (I think it is cute that he calls her this) it’s the eve of her 65th birthday and she brings me presents and enough food to feed us for weeks.

I have been busy getting to know Al’s family.  What a bunch of good souls.  Each and everyone, including their son, my Al Lal.

Bi-polar person of the day – Flave “can’t truss it”
Grateful 4 – TEEPOO

August 28, 2007
“You are the apple of my eye”
“With a little help from my friends”
“Do you need anybody.  Yes I need somebody to love”
“Love is in the air”

Also a hell of a lot of pollution.  I am now a good barometer for air quality and I will tell you it sucks big time.

We need more trees and fewer cars.  Yesterday I went with Al to the un justice office at Dufferin and Finch during rush hour and thought I was going to die.  I could barely breathe.

Thank you god for the nice taxi driver who offered to put on the air conditioning for me.  It was an immediate relief.

Thank you Sela for our home.  Our apartment is surrounded by trees and vines.  As soon as I walk in I feel such a relief to be home.  Talking about relief we actually had a full night of zzzzzzzz’s.

Routine, how important for us human beans.  Some of us anyway and definitely Al and I and teepoo 2.

So yesterday was like a holly day for us.

The day didn’t start off perfect.  I was tired and weak, so when I talked to Lorraine I was very hurt that she still doesn’t understand what we are going through.

My sister-in-law Louise also seems so distant.  Why?  I now know it is not something I will ask myself anymore.  I set myself free from the chains that bind me; my friends and family.

Not that I don’t love them all but I know they are not meant to come along on my (our) secret journey.  It is only meant for three, Al, Tee and Me. 

So once I counted all my lucky stars I knew where my alliances/priorities lie.

#1      Al
#2      TeePoo
#3      and just as important:  Our Mission

So the rest of the day went perfectly.  A little love making, a little wine, and I was fine in no time.  We ate at home for the 1st time.  

Al and I took Tee for his nightly walk.  We smoked some herb and our minds were finally clear of any fear.

Today is gong to rock and roll.

Bi-polar person of the day – Jonathan Winters
Grateful 4 - Sleep

August 29, 2007
The dog days of summer
Sometimes it’s time to air out your dirty laundry

Guess Tuesdays should be laundry day.  Al and I did I don’t know how many loads.  What a relief to get that out of the way.  Now we have all kinds of choices on what to wear on these dog hot days of summer.

Wonder, where that expression came form?  From the hot dog??? Lol.  You just never know.  I am feeling a little silly today.

Guess it because I am finally relaxing in my own skin.  I have been doing a lot of purging lately.  In more ways than one.

We are locked up tight and sound in our apartment.  All windows closed, doors shut, humidifier/air cleaner on (recommended product).  We are also making a point of having lots of plants around.  This helps the air quality which has really become a pain for me.

Pretty scary I say.  Whenever I go out in the open air lately I feel in despair.  What is this world coming to? 

I use to love summer
          “Now summer has gone”

Al and I do try to get to bed early but sleeping is the problem.  Too many other things we would rather be doing.

We had a perfect day yesterday.  What a relief.  Because we have really been living with a lot of heat!

There are so many things on our mind but we must really take it one step at a time.

Dom’s dropping by in a few minutes to give us the low down.

Bi-polar person of the day – Vincent Van Gough
Grateful for – Fresh Air (if I ever find some)

Whatever is a Vice
          Is a
                         V ice

What is a vice = Stress = neck tie

August 30, 2007
How to deal with stress
What is a vice… stress…  it wrings your neck

Another full 7 hours of zzzz’s.  Wonderful for Al, I and Teepoo 2.  Teepoo is such a curious dog.  He won’t sleep unless we are and since he is our baby we must be conscious of this.  Teepoo has added calm in our lives… so much less stress.  What a difference I see in Al to have Teepoo as his pal.  Teepoo is good for me too.  Makes me feel like a mommy.

So after Dom came yesterday and gave us the lowdown on where we stand financially in order to purchase this home a lot of stress fell from our shoulders because we are in better shape financially then we originally anticipated.  Don’t know where Dom found all those dealers that are making it possible for us to live our dreams.  But he certainly has some high up connections.  What a stress release it was to finally know the truth.  A lesson there for us.  Get the numbers down, and this is exactly what we will be working on during the next week.

Al and I realize that it is important that we do our own business plan.
          “With a little help from our friends”.

We finally got in touch with Eugene.  We know we shouldn’t be concerned, because those kids are so eager to be involved in this project.  Anyway Sasha is going away on a trip to Portugal to visit family (which is always stressful… well something I can attest to). So they have been spending as much time alone as possible because they will miss each other.  I think this is very sweet and exactly what Al and I would do.  When  you are with your soul mate, your priorities change and after all “intimate love” is the only truth… everything else is an illusion.

Al and I had a relatively calm day.  The only frustration came when we went to the library.  Once again the weather was so hot and oppressive… it is very stressful to our bodies.

Another huge big stress for me is dealing with any beaucracy; to name a big one, the government.

Well we have been trying to gather our funds from different bureaucracies (I wonder why these words are always hard to spell?) but this is the worst one so far.  Trying to get my money from my RRSP.  At least 50 pages of bull shit I need to fill out to prove I am in dire circumstances and this is just the beginning of a long onerous task, I am sure.  I will keep you posted.

Anyway, it just sucked both of our energy away.  When we got home after dealing with all these stressors we need to relax.  Well there is nothing like
          “Some afternoon delight”

to melt your cares away.  Al afterward slept like a baby (so did teepoo.  Sticks to Al like glue.  I was in such a mellow mood, I decided to just do some Art for the sake of Art.  Just picked up my markers and crayons and played like a kid.  It was so therapeutic and the results were kind of pretty I think.

And believe it or not, I actually cooked Al dinner (even if he says it doesn’t count because I just heated up some left overs).  Anyway I was quite proud of myself and this always helps me feel content and happy.

Both Al and I thought we were the happiest people in the world yesterday.  Bet you Teepoo thought he was one lucky dog also.

          “We’re walking on sunshine and
                   Every little thing is going to be all right”

Still have some stressful bureaucracies to deal with for the next little while.  But the end is in site.  So Al just came in with some wine.  A real stress release of mine.

Bi-polar person of the day – Jim Carrey
Grateful for
Stress releasors
Making love
The Truth
August 31, 2007

And I said to myself
          What a beautiful world


Here I am sitting drinking a beer and ginger (who I head from yesterday – my American sister) tea (which really helps my breathing.

          Just breath

The beer helps my
          Love hangover

It’s a little past 10 a.m.   Al just went to take Tee 4 a Pee.  I am reminiscing about

Oh I do believe in Yesterday.

It was Al and my best day ever.  Lots of synchronicity for me.  I haven’t mentioned the now natural occurrence of God winks lately, because now they are a fact of my life and sometimes the messages are just meant for me.

But yesterday, there were a few to share to convince you that Al is my ONE.  Not that I ever had any doubt.

I strongly believe in the messages sent to me.  There is no such thing as co-incidence and when they happen to you, one after another, you would be pretty stupid not to agree.

Well it was the perfect day yesterday.  Whether wise too.  Which greatly helps our mood.  Dom came by for us to sign yet another agreement.  We thank God every day for Dom.  He is instrumental in making our
          “Dreams come true”

Al and I just spent the rest of the day doing errands and shooting the shit.  In our
          “Little old Love shack”

Well that is not all we did..
          “Some afternoon delight”

is now a regularity.  What a stress release.  Puts Al to zzzzz and makes me feel like a true Artist.

So afterwards, I decided to do my Art on the computer.  All the things I learnt!  So much, I still don’t know...  But I am still working on my
project.  Trying to put all the pieces together.  For some reason it feels like a puzzle to me.  I finally found the last picture of the puzzle and co-incidentally the page went black on me.   When I saw it in the light, is said AL
                    You are the One

So with all the God winks happening to me, I would be pretty stupid not to agree.

Another strange or what are the odds of this happening, thing occurred.  Al and I were watching some old Eddie Murphy comedies.  Al leaves the room, the video just freezes, and I knew without a doubt as soon as Al entered the room it would start again…
          And it did, it did, it did.

How peaceful this makes me feel.  Believing in my higher power is so important to me.

We also goggled Lhaso Apso on the net to see if they were similar to Tee.  We are so honoured to find out that Tee is a very special breed.  One of the first too.  Originally bred by monks in Tibet to protect royalty, a Dali Lama dog!  The picture’s don’t look very much like Tee (definitely some terrier, or Theriault as Al jokes, in him) but the description of their personalities fits Tee to a Tee.  We are truly blessed with such a gift that we know was heaven sent.

We also had our real 1st home cooked meal last night.  It was heaven.

Bi-polar person of the day – Sting

What to be grateful for – My number 1 and Teepoo 2

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